Loch Ness

Loch Ness

Thursday, March 17, 2011

The Scientific Method

Before I even opened my eyes this morning I did not want to get out of bed.  I had the usual morning conversation in my head with myself.  “It’s so warm in this bed and so cold out in the world.”  “I’m so comfortable in Sam’s arms, if I stay I can extend this snuggle a little longer.”  “You probably will have nothing to do at work again today...you’ll probably be all alone at work again today, doing nothing but entertaining the tenants renting space in your head and feeding into your depression.”  “Maybe you should call in sick since she doesn’t need you anyways and spend the day in bed watching Glee.”  Then the voice of reason (which is so faint I rarely hear it), kicked in and said, “you lost a hundred bucks at the casino last night, maybe you shouldn’t be taking anymore time off work.”  “Sam is going to be getting up for work in an hour, so at most this snuggle can be extended for 60 more minutes.”  “You only have five more episodes of Glee until you are caught up, maybe you should space them out a little bit more so you have something to look forward to.  Instead of doing what you did with the Twilight series and the Hunger Games, reading them all in a week and feeling like you lost your best friend to a horrific parasitic disease from the jungle when you were finished.” Then the last thing my head said that sealed the deal was, “If you get out of bed you can stop at Starbucks on the way to work and sample some more of those cake pops Colleen bought you last night,” that did it, I kissed Sam on the forehead and jumped out of bed as visions of cake pops danced through my head.  My stomach, like a compass to the sailors navigating their way to the new world, guides most of my major life decisions.

There are three flavors of cake pops, Tiramisu, Birthday Cake, and Rocky Road, I have listed the aforementioned cake pops in order of my favorite, Tiramisu being number one.  I did not know that until I did my own little scientific experiment this morning to test which one I enjoyed most.  I learned in my biology class last semester that a hypothesis is an explanation for a phenomenon which can be tested in some way.  A theory is based on a hypothesis and backed by evidence.  Using the scientific method, and my keen taste buds I decided to test my hypothesis which was, “Tiramisu flavored cake pops are the most delectable flavor of cake pops.” 

My friend Colleen is out visiting from New York for her spring break and we decided to take an impromptu trip to the casino last night with my boyfriend and his roommate Robby.  Along the way we stopped at Chick-Fil-A, one of my favorite fast food eateries.  For some reason that I would have to do a scientific experiment to explain to you, Chick-Fil-A’s are plentiful and littered along the 10 freeway on the way to Palm Springs, but they are very scarce in LA and the surrounding areas.  Every time I go to Big Bear or Palm Springs I look forward to the ritual stop at Chick-Fil-A.  After Chick-Fil-A, Colleen wanted to run into Starbucks, a trip that I decided to forego as I have given up caffeine after 2 pm (another experiment of mine showed me that caffeine was contributing to my increasing anxiety, and my sleepless nights).  It was after 2 pm, so I waited in the car.  Colleen returned and produced one Starbucks brown bag for me with a little treat inside, a Tiramisu cake pop.  I was hesitant, I had seen the cake pops propaganda in Starbucks for a few days and wondered about them, but I generally find Starbucks cakes too dry so hadn’t tried them yet.  In order not to offend Colleen’s delicate spirit, I decided to take a bite.  It was like biting into a piece of Jesus.  So soft and moist, the perfect texture and flavor, and the perfect ratio of cake to icing.  I decided right then and there that If I was stranded on a deserted island and could only take one thing, it no longer would be my handsome sexy delicious boyfriend who gives me endless pleasure and could entertain me for hours on a deserted island, but Tiramisu cake pops.  This morning when I woke up I decided to test my hypothesis and make sure I wasn’t missing out on a different flavor and realize one day when Starbucks discontinues their cake pops (which inevitably happens with every delicacy I discover, and every nail polish color I love), that birthday cake flavor was like a teenage summer romance “the one that got away.”
I ordered three cake pops at the register and two teas just so the barista wouldn’t think I was a binging bulimic that was going to eat all three by myself.  I left Starbucks and disposed of my superfluous tea for my imaginary co-worker as soon as I was out of eyeshot of the barista.  I arrived at work, ten minutes late, and sat down at the table to start my experiment.  All the variables were in place, I was ready to test my hypothesis.  I swished my mouth out with water between tastes so that the pops flavors didn’t mix at all.  They are all like a gift from the heavens, all delicious and perfect in their own separate ways.  But this morning I proved my hypothesis a theory, Tiramisu is the most delicious cake pop of the three.   
I felt like sharing my joy of cake pops with the world.  I felt it would be a disservice to all my friends and selfish of me if I didn’t tell them about this small wonder.  Being the altruistic soul that I am, I updated my status message with my theory.  My friend Tree replied asking what flavor was my favorite and I told her that it would have to be Tiramisu, but that it was a photo finish and Birthday Cake was a very close second, almost too close to call.  Tree found my witty account of cake pops “hilarious” and suggested I start my own blog.  This was my solution, my answer to my prayers, my way to kill the long lonely hours at work.  I have always had an interest in writing and am hoping to someday channel it into a career and write the next great american novel.  This would be a great forum to keep my writers brain active and my dendrites moving and not let everything upstairs turn into mush at a job that doesn’t exactly “challenge” me.  But what would I blog about?  Why would anyone care?  Where could I start?  But I had this nagging feeling that this was something that was right up my alley, and if Tree (who probably is the most witty person I know) had faith in me, then maybe I should give it a go.  No matter what, blogging had to be less destructive and time sucking than stalking people on facebook, looking for the people who made my high school life miserable to make sure they aren’t successful, only to find their damn profile is blocked.  I opened up my lap top, and I gotta be honest, the blog kind of wrote itself. xoxo     


  1. you should really write a book, you are a very good writer.
    ps. i tried only the birthday cake one, and was also very impressed- rupee thoroughly enjoyed it!!


  2. "looking for the people who made my high school life miserable to make sure they aren’t successful" so glad I'm not the only one.

  3. please sir, I want some more.....